never did figure it out but sure know why I divorced him! Some of you are so lucky to have such supportive husbands - I never had that - his mom always came first and kids and me last. He was a control freak and even threatened to drive off a cliff and kill himself once b/c he was mad at me - funny thing is - we live in the flatlands of Illinois so not sure where he intended to find the cliff around here! So count your blessings!