This was told to me by an old farmer at our highschool spaghetti supper last night:
Seems these two old farmers Bill and Fred were brothers and had been farming for years. One morning Bill walks out to the barn and sees Fred doing a striptease in front of the old John Deere hooked up to the plow.
"What in tarnation are you doin?" he yells.
"Well" says Fred, "Me and the Missus been a fussin so we went to one of them new-fangled marriage counselors."
"And?" asks Bill.
"Yeah", says Fred,"He told me what to do, but I can't for the life of me see how its gonna work."
"What did he tell you?" asks Bill.
Fred replies"He told me to act sexy to a tractor."