I had a disasterous first marriage-but I've been married almost 20 years now, and still sooo happy! I think it's important that both of you give-without keeping track, and saying "I love you" often, and keeping a sense of humor as much as possible. Don't sweat the small stuff-or the big stuff. Let things go! We've weathered a lot of stuff in 20 years-including losing everything he worked for when he sold his business to his druggie son-enough to destroy any marriage. . .but we worked together, accepted the loss and eight years later, we're as strong as ever.