It doesn't take 45 minutes to get a dog ready to go outside in the winter.
Dogs cannot lie.
Dogs never resist nap time.
You don't need to get an extra phone line for a dog.
Dogs don't pester you about getting a kid.
Dogs don't care if the peas have been touched by the mashed potatoes.
Average cost of sending a dog to school: $52, Your kid: $103,000.
Dogs are housebroken by the time they are 12 weeks old.
Your dog is not embarrassed if you sing in public.
If your dog is a bad seed, your genes cannot be blamed.