I thought I ought to follow up with this and let you know what happened.
The last time I talked to my mom we had that fight. We emailed back and forth and things seemed to be going all right with her treatment. The tumor was gone but they were continuing the chemo.
Then she started to get blood clots and developed pneumonia. She went into the hospital at the beginning of May. On Mother's Day my brother emailed me that she wasn't doing well and was in the hospital, he wasn't sure that she'd be able to leave. My aunt decided to fly down to see her and got there last Friday. Mom was doing better and they made the hospice arrangements. Monday night she deteriorated and then Tuesday she passed away.
It was so sudden there wasn't time for me to get there, and my brother said they hadn't expected for her to go so quickly. I guess I should be grateful that for a death from cancer there wasn't a great deal of time spent in pain or in the hospital.
My mother didn't want a religious service so there won't be anything until we do the interment at some future date. I don't have much sense of closure about this.
I know it's early yet so my crying jags aren't unusual. I'm thinking about asking my brother whether I can move in with him. I do miss having some family around and I feel a little lost right now.