Originally Posted by DogHouseMom
I'm cracking up with this thread and nodding so much I must look like a bobble head dog in back car window!!
Well endowed people like me, and clearly some of you, will almost never find the "perfect" bra. I've come to the conclusion they don't exist. They feel great in the dressing room, but the little (Ok, big) suckers are sneaky. They wait until we take them home and wear them an hour before they spring their bag of tricks on our lady friends.
The straps bite into your shoulders so you get a wider padded strap.
The straps slide off your shoulders so you get ones that tighten only to figure out that tight isn't tight enough.
The backs ride up - my personal pet peeve. Being of the large variety coupled with the old variety, gravity has taken over so rehearse your 1st grade lessons on Newton. I'm thiking I might get a pair of suspenders and attach them to the back of my bra and then to my socks - kill two birds with the same stone.
So you get one with a REALLY wide back strap and realize that you preferred breating after all.
The underwire cuts into the arm pits, or worse ... POPS!
Too much padding (why would they pad anything larger than a C cup is beyond me), so you buy a thinner bra.
The thinner bras don't have the support and freely announce cold days to the whole world.
So you find the middle ground - slightly padded, but these are so stiff that when you move around they bunch and bend out making it look like you're actually hiding live aliens in your bra and they're trying to escape.
Then you have the brilliant idea that what our big old gravity stricken girls really need is a sports bra. I have one that has 7 snaps in the front. First I have to bend all the way forward to get the girls tucked in, then I have to snap the bottom snap, then I have to lay down to get the remainder of the snaps snapped but usually what happens is that the bottom snaps comes out ... so back to step 1. Eventually I get in, but stand back when it's time to take that sucker out cause I can put an eye out.
The pretty ones ... oh please. I tried to get one of those push up bras (go back to the gravity lesson) at Victoria Secret and the sales girl tried to talk me into a C cup - probably because they just don't carry sizes greater than anorexic.
When I get home at night and come to the point in the evening when I know I'm no longer going out in public, the bra comes off. Usually while I'm watching TV. Hubby dear loves these moments and as soon as he sees the bra make it's escape from under my shirt he says "thunk ..... thunk". Funny ... I never say that when he takes off his shorts :) (I know - TMI!!!)
Bras. Hate them. Need them. Kinda like jobs.