As most of you know, I am a lesbian. I am in a relationship with an amazing woman. I have never done anything to hide my sexuality. My parents have been supportive and have never questioned it. Until last night…
My sister Lisa got married today. Last night we had the rehearsal and then the rehearsal dinner. We had to wait for our table for 30 minutes (there were 26 people in our party). We waited outside while they got our table ready. While we were sitting outside, I leaned over and gave Cathie (my girlfriend) a very light kiss. My mom went berserk. She said that it is not right for us to kiss in public or show signs of affection in public. She also said that it isn’t right for other people to see or know what my sexual orientation is.
That broke my heart. She has never ever been anything but supportive but this really took me for a loop. About the time my mom finished talking/yelling at me I saw my sister Lisa give her fiancé a HUGE kiss. I then said to my mom (in anger) that she needed to tell Tony and Lisa to knock it off because I did not want their sexuality shoved down MY throat. UGH.
I should not have spoken to my mom in anger. I am sorry for that. But, how could you say and act supportive at home but then we when go out together you are now embarrassed? I have never done anything to cause my mother to be ashamed of me. EVER. But now I feel so hurt that my mom is ashamed of me.
I have run into homophobia all of my life and I have come to the conclusion that there is no wonder that so many of our LGBT youths are committing suicide.
I am sad. I am hurt. I went to the wedding that I wish were mine, served cake and smiled. This was going to be so hard. My eyes are full of tears and I am trying my hardest not to let them fall.
Thank you guys for being here for me!
Missy