So sorry for the troubles your son is facing. I agree with everyone else and as you have done - put the quilt aside and work on something else until there is a final decision. One thing you could reccommend, if you feel comfortable doing so, is suggest to your son that he watch the movie Fireproof. It is GREAT! I have seen it 2 times and a big group at our church is getting ready to start the Fireproof your marriage (Love/Dare) sessions. After 17 years, my DH and I are fine ~ but this will just re-enforce our marraige for rough times.
Piedmont Quilter
Rebecca