It sounds to me like he's terrified. You need to find out what he's scared of. Is he scared because so many people nowadays are losing their homes? Does he think you can't afford a house payment? Does he not want to deal with the maintenance and upkeep a house requires?
You really need to figure out how much your house payment should be, and shop from that point. DO NOT rely upon the numbers the bank gives you. Your house payment should be 1/4 your take-home pay. If you end up having children, you will probably want to figure this on your husband's income alone, at least for the first couple of years of the child's life, which means either a low payment or a nice fat savings account. There are lots of mortgage calculators on the internet - google them and find one that will help you find what you can afford. This first step might help your husband.
Good luck.