I always found that for our most passionate disagreements/differences of opinion.... it was hard to discuss without losing my train of thought or getting too upset to speak. So I found, that writing to my husband worked best. I could really think about what I wanted to say, say it well without being judgmental and I couldn't be interrupted. I also found that giving him time to digest what i said was best. We've been married 35 years and started "dating" (hanging out on lunch at school and stuff like that)for 10 years prior to that....... 45 years all together.