I know exactly how you feel. My quilt, Kaaterskill, had two fabrics that bled badly. When I pulled it out of the washer, I could instantly tell how bad it was, because all the yellows were tinged with pink. My husband said the same thing yours did - that no one would notice.
I did try and wash it one more time, to no avail, and finally decided that anything else I would do would make the situation worse, not better. However, I showed that quilt in a few major shows, and not one judge mentioned the bleeding, and in fact it did very well in all of them.
If you have any scraps of the fabric, you could try washing them in Syntrapol and see how it works out. I'm suspicious about the front loader washer - I think mine allows the quilt to sit too long in water without agitating it, and that's part of the problem. If you have access to a top loader that will continuously agitate the quilt, that might work better.
Good luck...I'm sure the quilt is a beauty no matter what the fabric did.
Janet