The kids were selling extra large bath towels at our club (for fundraising). They were embroidered with
"FACE" on the top of the towel, and "BUTT" near the middle, so you would know where your butt had been.....
The big kid selling them always got a laugh when he'd add, "ONE SIZE, FITS ALL"
That would be fast to make with an embroidery machine. But you could also wing it with machine-applique.