Rhonda - your mom sounds like mine in a lot of ways! She too shows love with practical help or giving you stuff. If you've got a problem or are upset her words are invariably 'pull yourself together ' or 'it could be worse'. And she says nice stuff about me to other people but not to my face; but I'm finally coming to accept that it's just her way - she won't change and she DOES love me. Not that I don't get angry and/or upset sometimes over something she says but it's getting better - and Hans helps a lot; he's very good at verbalising things, which I'm not! Bizarre since English is his second language! But I love my Mum, I'm glad to have her, and will miss her when she's gone, (which, God willing won't be for a VERY long time) - doesn't stop her from driving me up the wall sometimes though!