Some people have commented that the opinions expressed in this post are just that – opinions – and they don’t understand why others feel that the conversation has turned ugly. I’ve been thinking about that and think I can explain.
Let’s pretend that we’re participating in a cooking forum rather than a quilting forum. (That would never happen, because I am NOT a cook. But I can pretend.) Here’s how the posts go…
Poster 1: “I like chili with beans, but I think that too many cooks are putting beans in their chili.”
Poster 2: “I agree”
Poster 3: “I agree, and I also think that they do it because beans are cheap. They make an easy filler.”
Poster 4: “Yeah, I don’t like beans in my chili and I also don’t like it when they use ground beef. Chili should be made with shredded beef. Using ground beef makes it taste greasy.”
Poster 5: “I make my chili with ground beef and it doesn’t taste greasy. I strain off the grease after I brown the meat.”
Poster 6: “Yes, ground beef makes for greasy chili. You can light it with a match.”
Poster 7: “I don’t use beans because they’re cheap. My family likes them. We’re vegetarians and don’t use any meat at all in our chili.”
Poster 8: “I like beans in my chili occasionally, but not all the time. Why do the professional cooks think they have to add them every time? I think it’s because it’s so easy just to open the can and dump them in.”
Poster 9: “I agree.”
Poster 10: “Chili with ground beef is way too greasy, and it’s not good for you. Why not just poison your family and get it over with?”
Poster 5: “I wish this conversation wasn’t getting so ugly.”
Poster 10: “What? We’re just expressing our opinions.”
Well, you get the idea. The cook who puts beans in her chili and uses ground beef has been sufficiently pummeled by now. Her explanation that her chili is not greasy because she drains the meat has fallen on deaf ears. The vegetarian cook has been told that others think she is using beans because they’re cheap and easy. In short, people who “were only expressing their opinion” have unintentionally insulted people who do things in a different way. Underline that word – UNINTENTIONALLY.
You don’t agree? Think about the comments about dense quilting causing quilts that could stand up on their own, or weren’t soft and cuddly, or stiff as cardboard? Those of us who like denser quilting have just been told that our quilts are stiff and uncomfortable. We know it isn’t true – if it were, we wouldn’t quilt them that way.
Again, I agree that no one has intentionally said anything to specifically hurt anyone else. But I make my chili with beans AND ground beef, and it’s not greasy, and I'm not being cheap. (And I’m from Texas originally, and I know that beans don’t belong in chili, but I put them in anyway.)