Bad News and Really Bad News - joke
"Yeah, Doc, what's the news?" asked grandpa Sam when his doctor called with his test results. "I have some bad news and some really bad news," said the doctor. "The bad news is that you only have 24 hours to live." "Oh no!," gasped Sam as he dropped to his knees. "What could be worse news than that?"
The doctor replied "I couldn't get hold of you yesterday."