If I were in this situation I hope I would be considerate of my daughter's feelings and help her make her dad a quilt. Her dad will always be her dad and like it or not that will never change. For your daughter's sake, please try to get to the point where you can at least pretend to tolerate your ex as there will be school events, graduations, a wedding and the birth of grandchildren where she will want you both to be there. Please don't make these events stressful for your daughter and put her in the position where she has to make a choice between her parents. I'm sure she feels a big void in her life due to the divorce and really doesn't understand why it happened. Please think about what you do or say in situations concerning her father so that it doesn't make your daughter feel she is being punish for something she had no control over. Reading between the lines, it shows that you are trying to do right thing, that you are a loving Mother and that your daughted feels she can talk to you about anything. I wish the only best for you and your daughter in the future.