I would do the quilt with my daughter, if I had one. One thing I did learn, during the EX process, is that to never talk bad about the children's father. I also agree that you let your anger out when no one is around. One thing that really lets out the anger is to have a large teddy bear and a child's plastic bat. (of course no one can be around) Then talk to the bear, and then hit the bear with the bat. It sound's silly, but it really helps the anger to melt away.