Hi, I always pre-wash with very little detergent, to set the colors and so the fabric will distort (if it's going to) before I cut it and quilt it.
I have never used fabric softener or dryer sheets, once when doing a lot of costume sewing for a friend, I got sick to my stomach and a pounding headache, figured out later (when it came back again) that it was from pressing and working with the fabric that had all the chemicals still in it from the fabric softener.