I agree, usually the denser the quilting, the stiffer the quilt. Also, I don't know what QAYG method you are using, but my favorite is where you use sashing to connect the quilted blocks. This can make the quilt a bit stiffer, but what I've done in the past is not quilt and join every block separately. I make a section of quilt blocks about a yard square, joining the blocks with regular sashing who's width will match the sashing of the QAYG joins. Quilt these large sections, then join as you usually do. This cuts down on the bulkier seams. One yard squares seem to work well for my fmq, but you can make them any size that works for you. Don't know if this helps.