Ok, I've got a couple.
Years ago, when I first moved out, my roommate never knew how to cook, never learned to make anything, like I'm not even exaggerating. The only thing she could do was open a can of soup and nuke it.
So she decided to make kraft dinner (kraft macaroni and cheese? in the US, I think...) so anyway, she's reading the directions on the side of the box, boiling the noodles, stirring, measureing milk and butter ... except she never drained the water from the noodles before putting the milk and cheese sauce in it. EWWWWWW!!!!!
A while ago, my bf made chicken tournedos in the oven, they were yummy but messy and it made a big mess on the bottom of the oven... he didn't clean it ( no excuse, we have a self cleaning oven) a few days later, I decided to make pie, so I preheat the oven and stated making my pies, and by the time they were ready to go in the oven and I opend the door, the crap on the bottom of the oven had burned up and smoked out my kitchen... really bad! I opened the patio door and was trying to fan out all the smoke so it didn't set off the fire alarm in the building (you get a huge fine for that), finally, I gave up and stuck my pies in... um without putting a cookie sheet under them to catch the sugar that always spills over. Made a mess, but it wasn't too bad. I took my pies out, and decided to let the oven cool so I could get the worst of it out before putting the self clean... and I forgot!
So, the next day, we go to make something else. Without checking first to see if I had cleaned his original mess, Sasha turned on the oven to pre heat, and a couple of minutes later we start sniffing something weird... FIRE!!!!! OMG the whole oven was on fire! Not much you can do, right, but keep the door closed and hope it burns out, lol. Ya, so I got in trouble for that one, even though he's just as guilty as me for not having cleaned the original mess , lol!
Oh, oh! Another one. Sash loves to cook, he's really creative and loves trying new things, and making things from scratch. We do not have a fryer, but he decided to make chicken parmesan from scratch, made the crumb mix and everything... He had helped a friend who is a chef make this recipe not long before and was very confidant in himself... over confidant, lol!
So he fixes the chicken coats it in batter and crumb mix and then puts about 3" of oil int he frying pan (!) already I'm not liking this,and he puts it on high. I told him it was going to make a mess, the oil was too hot, the pan is not deep enough, it's dangerous etc. and he argued with my about the fact that this is the way Jeff did it, and don't argue because he knew what he was doing. Ok. So he puts the first chicken breast in. AAAASAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
so the whole stove and counter is being splattered with hot oil, this thing is practically burning the supper on contact, and you can't really just shove the pan over onto an non lit ring because you risk sloshing oil onto the ring and setting the house on fire.... but don't listen to me, right?
Finally he took a dish towel and a rag and grabbed the handles and lifted the pan off the stove and onto the cutting board.... I think that was the scariest thing that ever happened to him in the kitchen.
But I didn't dare tell him "I told you so"... lol!