Mine will come into the fabric store and participate in picking fabrics out if it's for something I'm making for someone on his side of the family. Otherwise I'm pretty much on my own, which suits me just fine, because I'm a "browser" and I like to take my time and let my imagination roam while I shop. He'll play along and be patient but I can tell it's an effort, so why put him through it?
We have separate hobbies and separate finances, and even separate "studios" in the house (his is a music studio), so there's no guilt or hiding when we buy stuff for ourselves.
My mom never worked, and would basically "embezzle" family funds for her own hobbies, and really DID sneak around and spend money and hide purchases from my dad, to the detriment of the family. (To the point where we had to borrow from relatives to make rent several times a year.) I swore I would NEVER do the same, not to any degree, no matter what my circumstances were. Happily, both me and my spouse have a strong work ethic and good jobs so it's not an issue with us, at all. (And we don't have kids, so that makes it much easier for us to spoil ourselves.)
That's not to say I don't "punish" him when he IS being a Mr. Smartypants... ;-) We tease each other often, it's just how we are. We've been together since high school so apparently it works for us!
