cricket_iscute

I appreciate this thread. For 17 years, I've made quilts for homeless families, and have delivered more than 400 quilts of all sizes, but mostly adult. I spend most of my free time doing this, and litter the house with quilting stuff. The quilts take from 70 to 300 hours to do each, with most in the lower category. This takes hundreds of hours a year, actually thousands of hours, and maybe that's too much. (I don't have time to make quilts for me.) I keep the quality high. I spend hundreds of dollars a year on batting, backing, borders, storage, thread, etc., and people who know what I'm doing donate scraps and sometimes yardage. I make a lot of scrap and string quilts. I've had about ten thank you notes in 17 years. (I make sure to always send thank you notes.) This year I'm covering two shelters of boys with no families, ages 6 to 18. They need 30 quilts. I am struggling to get them done by Christmas.

I seldom have any feedback or thanks, and getting a receipt from last year's shelter turned into a marathon event with me needing to call them four times. (They will be surprised when they do not get quilts this year, the 13th year, having received close to 200 quilts so far. They seem to believe they are entitled to quilts now, and called me to see when I was delivering "their" quilts.) I was discouraged as I have been many times, but kept going, considering it to be God's work. Still, when deadlines loom -- and I do not find deadline sewing fun -- and there seems to be so much work to do, I wonder if I'm crazy. Recently, I've asked a couple friends why I do it, what's wrong with me. One said it seems to be universal among quilters to make quilts for others. I suspect many of you are not making this many quilts, doing a sort of production line. Is this the difference in the level of satisfaction? Also, I am giving almost exclusively to homeless people; could that be it? When I tried to give quilts to people whose homes were destroyed in tornadoes, the city agency involved didn't even bother to call back. If I gave to QOV or another organization, would the quilts be appreciated more?

Twice, but only twice, I have received feedback that told me the quilts did matter. Two years ago, I delivered to two different shelters. One shelter (20 adult quilts) was for young women who were trying to kick substance addiction. They hugged me and cried, and I was amazed, since the year before that, at another shelter (24 quilts), I was told to drop the quilts on the table and get out, no appreciation, no thanks, not even a glance at the quilts. I received a letter this week from that shelter asking for money for Christmas gifts for the residents, by the way, but not quilts. Those quilts weren't valued, and these, at the addicted women's shelter, were. I asked what they meant. I was told that everyone treats those young women "like trash" and I was treating them as human beings and giving Christmas gifts to them. At the next shelter (17 quilts), a shelter I had been to many times for many years, I asked the women receiving the quilts what they meant. One woman told me that I was one of the few people to treat her as though she were a human being. Another said the quilts were "like gold", that not only did her quilt mean beauty and warmth to her, but she had been burned out of her home and it was literally her only possession in addition to the clothing on her body. I had never known the quilts had this meaning; homeless people are very protective of "their story" of how they became homeless. Also, there is a perception in the homeless shelters that anyone who donates or tries to help does so only to make themselves feel better. (I assure you, I could feel better in a lot less time and without being buried in stuff.)

Every now and then, I get help from other quilters. I appreciate that greatly. I have sewed with others from time to time. The woman who partnered with me and helped me the most helped me last year isn't as available this year due to family, etc. I am the only person I know who has kept this up year in and year out. I really don't know what drives me, other than the fact that, after a serious injury and inability to work for several years, I was on the brink of losing my home and had to give serious thought to how we would survive, eat, sleep, get medical attention, etc, if homeless. Maybe making so many quilts does not allow the kind of enjoyment you are all describing, although I do like making quilts, any quilts. I guess I'd like some appreciation. Should I donate somewhere else? Should I stop making charity quilts and make quilts to sell? Should I make one or two quilts a year for QOV or another organization, pat myself on the back, and be done with it? Why do I continue with this project? I actually asked a psychologist if I'm mentally ill, and I'm not. Is something wrong with me? I know I'm discouraged, and I'm sorry to be negative. I would appreciate your feedback.

Cricket