Everyone learns in one of three ways, or a combination of the three.....aural (hearing), visual (by seeing) or kinesthetic (by touch and feel)...that is why maybe reading a pattern or book is not always the best way for you to "see" it. Videos may help in this case. Or, as you are doing, building a block first (that's kinesthetic learning, by the way
). Keep working at it, you will find a source, or teacher, or friend who "teaches" just like you learn.
Jan in VA