It sounds to me like there is something else really going on, like some underlying problem. You really don't need to waste time worrying about moving a glass from the table to the sink...use the time for something more productive. Move the glass or the trash and don't put emotional value on it. It's just a glass or a bag or whatever. How about trying this: with a sincere smile, just say, "here, let me get that for you." Treat her with kindness and don't look for slights where none may be intended. (If it were intended, you will disarm her with your kindness!)