I think you need to come west of the Mississippi - it sounds like San Diego is the place for you. Our average temperature is low 70's year round - we have about 2-4 weeks of hot weather, but fans take care of that. We do have snakes but in 40 years I have seen 2 and I was at work. Now if you live on a canyon there is a bigger chance.
We moved here from the Seattle area in 1973 and felt like we moved to Camelot. Not to mention we have the "World Famous San Diego Zoo" so if you feel like walking through a jungle and seeing exotic animals, we have them, too.
We have fabric stores, quilt shops (but if you are looking for fabric, Rosie's, has over 10,000 bolts at a most reasonable prices).
The only placed that flooded in San Diego was when they built a commercial area in the San Diego River bed - not sure why they were surprised when it flooded, but it has since been corrected.