I am sorry you had a bad experience. I am sorry for anyone who has a bad experience. BUT I think most quilters are nice people and we share a common interest. When I attend a meeting or the first couple of meetings I don't expect people to exhert themselves on my behalf. I am just watching and seeing if we will be a good fit. It is like being the new kid at school. Dynamics are probably different in a smaller group but overall I think it is best to give them the benefit of the doubt.
I have pointed this out before but when I go to guild I am going to sit with my four friends that I am very close to and I haven't seen them for a month or two and yes I will be polite if I see someone new near me but I am focused on my friends. We have 15 mins to socialize before the meeting.
I have belonged to a couple guilds and only found fault with two visitors and even then I didn't say anything. One time in Tennessee a woman came to the guild and had an Underground Railroad quilt but she proceed to lecture us on the Underground Railroad as if we didn't know anything and said she was going from guild to guild sharing her information. The second visitor was someone who apparently had a longarm business and she was using her show and tell as an overt commercial.