Hear! Hear! I am so with you on this- I never let a quilt go out the door without having washed it first- for this same reason. I have a friend who gifted a quilt one time that had not been laundered- the recipient had this exact thing happen when she laundered it- and cried & cried- then hid the quilt when ever the (gifter) came to visit- afraid to tell her- the (gifter) was angry for years- complaining non stop about how this *giftee* was an ungrateful.... : the *giftee* loved that quilt, thought it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen/received- it caused hard, hurt feelings for years- until an *outsider* who was a friend of both parties (me) could not take it any longer and broke a promise.
always, always avoid putting anyone in such a position---wash those quilts--- make sure they are going to stand the test before passing them on- save everyone's feelings!