I've got quilts that have very dense FMQ all over, and they have a lovely soft drape.
I agree that the batting choice and the thread type have a lot to do with it. In my experience, hobbs 80/20 and aurafil thread are a nice combo if you like a lot of quilting.
I'd also say that your choice of backing and the piecing play a big part--
If your backing fabric is stiff, your quilt is going to be a lot more stiff. If you pick something with a lot of drape and softness and don't stretch and pull the backing during the layering step, that helps the finished quilt be snuggly.
If you have a heavily pieced pattern with many small pieces and a lot of weight in the seams, you're going to have a stiffer quilt than if you are using larger pieces or a whole cloth approach.