Wow, she really got into your head with her "rules"! Relax, it's not as scary as you think.
My bits of border advice:
* Audition different fabrics with your quilt centers. Unless my border fabric is also my focus fabric, I often wait till the center is done before I select any border fabrics because I tend to change my mind. If I do happen to select border fabrics prior to construction, I don't cut them until I'm ready to add borders, in case I change my mind at that point as well.
* If you are mitering the corners, sewing multiple borders together before sewing to the center will work, otherwise, add them one at a time.
* Vary the color/scale of each border to add interest
* Think of borders like you would art and how adding one or more mats along with the frame can really enhance the "art".
* Ditch the measuring tape/ruler when cutting the border length. I Follow Bonnie Hunter's method for perfect borders without measuring. It's difficult if you don't have a long enough table and fabric/measuring tapes can stretch or give just enough to make the cut inaccurate. If my top is longer than my table, I fold the top and pin the strips along the center fold, then fold the extra up as I go along when I am preparing to cut the borders to length.
http://www.quiltville.com/borderhints.shtml
* Pin! I start pinning the ends, middle, 1/4 way points, then pin every 6" or so.
* The only "rule" I follow is to NOT sew, then trim the borders after sewing, because that can result in a wavy border.