My, my, my, talk about the quilt border police. Your quilting friend may mean well, but obviously she is causing you to doubt your abilities, and that's not right. There are some great comments here on the QB and I suggest you read them, and then do what you feel right because that's the right thing to do. I had a quilt teacher who advised putting the inner and outer borders together to save time, as you have to sew them together eventually. Quilting should be FUN, not "work", so enjoy the process, do what you feel is right for you - that's the right answer to your question.