Chris what I'm hearing is that you and your group are fed up with some of the goings on (or not goings on), of this member. You are President so you are running the meetings, you have a computer so before your next meeting you should print out a list of questions and make a copy for each member (even ones you don't see often as well as the VP). Talk a little about what your going to be passing out, in that your group has been around for some time and NEEDS to get some GUIDLINES down so EVERYONE knows what to expect from EACH officer (ie:Showing up and SHARING time, DONATING of time and skills, HELPING to raise funds for your group, WORKING to help build a better group, Also how to handle DONATED items to better serve the group, and how to handle the making of items from donated items that MUST be returned to the group in a timely fashion for your foster families or for sale, etc..., etc..., etc...). Then e-mail or send to members that didn't come to the meeting. You might find that people you don't see often start to come back (seeing that someone is starting to take this group and your mission as a helping group more seriously), you might find that this has been part of why your group has stayed so small (because people get up happy with things, they might say something once or keep any eye on how this stuff gets worked out and if it's not then they drop out). This will give your VP a heads up, but also quietly and privately put her on the spot (I doubt that she will see it this way, she doesn't think she does anything wrong). You need to state on the sheet that you will open this up for group discussions at the following meeting and only forms returned to you by the week before your next meeting will be discussed and voted on. This will give you a chance to make your notes and get things ready for the VOTE, having the things listed for your Secretary to put the totals down for each item listed. This way after the break you can let everyone know what was voted in etc..., etc..., etc...
SORRY this was so long, hope you can find something that helps. Good luck