I'm a grazer too. I'm allowed by my height/weight/activity level to consume about 1600 calories per day. So I eat five or six SMALL meals a day...example:
1 slice 12 grain toast with 1 tbsp p'nut butter for breakfast. 208 calories
mid-morning snack of an apple, orange, granola bar, raisins... usually around 150 calories
Lunch is usually a large salad with 2 cups mixed lettuce, carrots, tomato, 1/2 ounce cheese. 1 slice extra lean ham and Newman's Own Vinagrette...total cals around 185 (Sometimes I add a couple of crackers...or I'll "splurge" and add crazins)
Snack in the afternoon, piece of fruit or yogurt...around 100 calories.
Dinner varies, a LOT! But by controling my daytime intake, i get to pretty much eat what I please for dinner, but I do try to limit it to about 600 to 800 calories, so that I can have a Skinny Cow ice cream for desert! ;)
I don't drink calories. I don't put sugar in my coffee anymore, I use Truvia. No creamer anymore either. I rarely drink a glass of milk, and any soda I consume is diet. About the only juice I drink is diet cranberry juice.
I don't deny myself anything that I really want. If I want chocolate, I have a package of dark chocolate, either the small Dove squares, or Hershey kisses on top of the fridge and I eat one or two of those. I've even been known to eat an entire candy bar...as an afternoon snack, or for desert after dinner.
The point being, it doesn't help to deny yourself something you really want...you're just going to binge on it later if you put it off long enough. Have it, but control it instead of letting it control you.