Thanks for all the replys ladies I'm not ignoring you been gone all day w/o internet access.
Terri, so sorry for your loss.
Janice that was BEFORE the scrubbing!!!!!!! Janice and Billi, both are beautiful kitchens. Mine is tiny and utilitarian.
I think I've decided not to go to the hospital, but to call and check in a few times. I can't shake the feeling that not letting me know was a message that I was not wanted. The person having the surgery is my latest step mother. I like her well enough. My father is the passive aggressive family member. We do not have a great relationship, definately not a typical father knows best type thing. W/o going way TMI he kidnapped us twice, was very mean about our mother, and there was abuse, has never acknowledged it and said one time, "I am sorry for what you think happened" and then said "I will never talk about it again" I would have cut him out of my life entirely then, but having a "relationship" (even if fake) was important to my Gma, and for her I would do nearly anything. I didn't include any of that background info so as not to prejudice your answers.