It's winter in Pennsylvania
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below.
Oh how I love Pennsylvania
When the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.
Yes, the weather here is wonderful,
So, I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Pennsylvania ,
Cuzz my ass is frozen to the ground.
You could substitute New Hampshire or Virginia or...