Maybe it’s time to put it aside. Find a Beginner friendly pattern you like, work on that, rebuild your esteem. Maybe complete a few new projects. Then when you feel better able to continue the ( beast project) get it back out and look at it with more experienced, fresh eyes. Many of us have jumped into something we were not really ready for- mine is still in a box- getting close to twenty years now. I insist I’m going to get it out and finish it ( someday)