I misunderstood your original post, Synnove. I thought you were referring to stitch length and consistency which only practice can really achieve, not tension. Yes, a perfect tension theoretically should be able to be done on a domestic machine. Have you had you sewing machine serviced? It might just need a good clean and spa day.
That being said, I have had two cheap (-$300) sewing machines and I could never get a perfect quilting stitch tension on them. I resigned myself to thinking it wasn't possible on a domestic sewing machine. Then I switched all my sewing to solely vintage machines and I have never had that problem since.