Barbm
Glad to hear that you're feeling a bit better. And I think you're on the right track. Set a few easy goals and once you handle them you feel better enough to handle a couple more and so on. It sounds like you definitely have enough going on to feel overwhelmed. I do agree with the poster who said your kids have to work out their own issues, you can only do so much.
I took a workshop once where they had us draw three circles within each other. The inner one was our Circle of Control and would contain only the things or thoughts that we can directly control. The next ring would be our Circle of Influence, where things would go that we could influence, but not control (like your kids spat), and the outer ring is Outside my Circle kinds of things that you just have to realize you can't control so you can identify which things to cross off your mental to-do list. It's helped me a lot to mentally assign an issue to it's "circle" to determine how much mental or physical energy to expend on it. If it's the outer circle, fuggetaboutit!
I've suffered with clinical depression for years, and am on medication and see a therapist for it. In my not-a-doctor view, you're more overwhelmed by current circumstances than actually depressed.
Take care, and be gentle with yourself. You can only do what you can do and the rest can slide and the world won't end. Take some "me" time to do something you love. (Sorry this is so long - I didn't mean for it to be.