I, too, have clinical depression. The first thing you need to do is see your Doc. If they find something, it can be helped. If not, it will at least give you peace of mind. Absolutly praying can help, I pray constantly, but my Dad had a saying "God helps those who help themselves" and it is so true. You can't just sit back and wait for Him to make things better. You have to act. As far as your kids are concerned, step back and tell them that you refuse to be pulled into the middle of anything. You love them both and will not take sides. They have to work this out for themselves. Emotional blackmail does NOT work. Your son will only resent you for it. DON'T feel guilty because they don't get along. They are adults and you are not responsible for how they act. ALL families have problems, we just don't always see them. There is no perfect family. As far as your siblings are concerned, if all you feel is hurt or used or whatever when you are around them, cut the ties. It took me a long time to realize this, but when I did cut all ties with my brothers, it was like a thousand pounds had been lifted from my sholders. You don't have to put up with anyone hurting you or trying to controll your life. You have to do what is best for YOU. Just remember that there are a lot of people here that will listen and be there for you. Go with God.