Quilter's Will
Since it's a new year, it might be time for us all to consider making our wills. Here's a sample of mine,Quilter’s Will
Being of sound mind and body (a statement that does not bear close scrutiny), I ______________ do hereby record my last will and testament. Knowing that _________________, my _______________ (husband, sister, daughter) has no appreciation, or for that matter knowledge of my extensive fabric collection, which, by the way is deposited in various places throughout my house for safe keeping. Knowing also that _________________has also notified the goodwill store should I precede him or her to that great quilt shop in the sky, to pick up and dispose of the aforementioned collection. Therefore I do WILL this collection and all other collections related to it, to my dear fellow fabric preservationist _________________. It is my wish that she, upon hearing of my death and obtaining clear proof that I didn’t not manage (although goodness knows I tried) to take it with me, will come to my home, before the goodwill store searches out my collection. That she should rescue said collection and stack it in my quilting studio, along with my sewing machines, frames, old buttons, lace, patterns. quilts, dolls and works in progress. And after she has done that, she should purchase refreshments for all my friends, not yet departed, which friends are also her friends, and every last one shall be in that room and they shall hold a wake and say lots of lovely and kind things about me until they run out and then they shall divide amongst themselves my wonderful collection. Be forewarned! I shall be hovering over that very spot until this done. _______________ shall then leave this spot and close the door, leaving the car, house, stocks, bonds and other worldly nonsense to those who don’t understand or know any better. This is my wish on the matter.
Signed: _____________________________________
Date: ___________________