I agree that you should try to look to the future and perhaps a great relationship with this young man. My GS has not been a part of his father's (my son) for over 10 years--father's choice. He is 17 also and has the most wonderful stepfather a young man could ask for. Although he did not adopt him, he is a son to him. My GS considers him his father. We had to learn to deal with that but so glad that he has this man in his life. He has raised him along with his two children from another marriage that he has had full custody of since they were infants. They allow my husband and I to be a full part of their lives also. Although we are saddened by my son's actions we are so greatful for this man. I know you will make the right decision for you and your family. Good luck.