save a quilt shopping trip for a time youre together... make sure you get EVERYTHING needed for it... fabric, thread, backing, batting... let her see how much it really costs (Id be evil and save up to get a very special 1 with all the best again) lol
Maybe if she sees the actual cost, you can sneak in a time frame of how much work and how long it will take :D
Maybe she will at least change her definition on "saving money"
My DH is still in the "I cant believe you spent that much for a baby quilt that isnt even made" stage lol... but he loves the results lol