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Thread: Help! I need advice.

  1. #1
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    Help! I need advice.

    A person has asked me to teach her how to quilt. That is not the problem. I'm way to much over weight, so I'm not being mean or any thing like that. This person weights about 650-700 lbs. Yes, that much. My worrie is how do I get her downstairs to my sewing room? She has a lot of mobility problems. It's to far to walk around to the bs-ment door and downhill-uphill so she can't go the didstance. The other thing is, what to have for her to sit on? It scares me to death to think of her trying to go down the stairs. 13 steps. What do I do?

  2. #2
    Super Member snipforfun's Avatar
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    I would suggest she go to a LQS for lessons. The store would be more accommodating for her. The classrooms would probably be on street level and would no doubt be able to spread her stuff out.

  3. #3
    Super Member azdesertrat's Avatar
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    cant go to her house? that would be the best thing.ask if she has a sewing machine,after all if you teach her ,she needs to be able to have access to a machine when she wants to sew, and not rely on being able to use yours all the time.
    But its a Dry Heat!

  4. #4
    Super Member Lori S's Avatar
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    Have you seen her "out and about" ? Is she really mobile? At that weight I would think stairs would be a strain on her heart. Have you mentioned that your sewing room is down stairs?
    Do not be afraid to bring the issue of her mobility up... she is more than aware of her weight and the restirctions. Be kind and have an concerned discusion , ask her how to best facilitate the leaning process, so she can particpate. In your conversations decribe all that is entailed , but in a lesson plan kinda of way.
    Most people who have this type of issue will typically respond well if you ask frankly and with genuine concern.

  5. #5
    Super Member LyndaOH's Avatar
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    I would try to go to her house if at all possible. I started quilting when I had an illness and couldn't leave my home for any length of time. Not only did it give me something to do, but it helped me heal faster because I became so passionate about it. I don't think I would have gotten out of the house as soon as I did had it not been for this hobby. If it's not too much trouble for you to go to her house, you may find that you help her become more mobile. Her lessons could be life changing.

  6. #6
    Power Poster QuiltE's Avatar
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    ITA with the others ... discuss the matter with her ... and opt for doing it in her home setting, so that she can learn in the environment where she is comfortable. You would be able to help her get her sewing space set up in a way that will work for her.

    If you are teaching her from scratch, this could be a long term relationship.
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    Sew many ideas ... just sew little time!!
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  7. #7
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    Is your garage at walk in level? As long as you have electricity out there you can set up a temporary sewing station. As for something to sit on, is she coming over with one of those motorized chairs? I would make the table with the machine fit that chair. Walmart sells bed risers that can be used the move a table up. If you can't manage to get her in our house you may need to go to hers. Does she want to learn how to use a machine or could you show her how to piece by hand? Not ideal but better than nothing.

  8. #8
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    It seems to me that going to her house would be the best solution. Maybe you could offer to get some of the supplies for her. I would be very worried about her getting down the stairs and even more worried about her comming back up the stairs. If you discuss this with compassion, it should be alright. Every one else has given you good advise. Good luck and keep us posted. Teaching another quilter is always a good thing!!
    Sue

  9. #9
    Super Member ArtsyOne's Avatar
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    I have a male friend who is the same size as yours. He is aware that he is fat, and we have had some honest discussions about the issue that none of my furniture is wide enough or may not be strong enough to hold him. In order to spare him embarrassment we have decided that we would visit at his home where he knows that no matter where he sits, he will not break anything and he knows that he can fit through the bathroom door and he knows that he can get up from a sitting position without struggle.
    A fabric stash is always missing that one fabric needed to finish the quilt on which you're working.

  10. #10
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    I agree, if possible go to her home. I would think she would be more comfortable there.
    http://www.oregonquilting.net
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  11. #11
    Senior Member batikmystique's Avatar
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    I agree that you should try to get her set up at her house, as she needs to be able to work on her projects at her home. Not sure what her mobility limitations might be, but if she is readily mobile and looking meet people through quilting, you could help her find a bee or a guild...that way she has the option to quilt at home or with a group. She will likely pick up quilting tips from others as well. I would not want to risk the possibility that she might fall while navigating your stairs, nor the liability issues that might come from it. Better for you to teach her at her house also because you can politely end the lesson when you feel and can leave more in a timely manner from her house than she could from yours.
    Creative clutter is better than idle neatness.

  12. #12
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    Go to her house even if you have to haul several things. Pick a simple 9 patch that doesn't much equipment.

  13. #13
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    I'm thinking that teaching her something she can sew by hand in her comfy chair would be a good match. Needle turn applique or english paper piecing come to mind.

  14. #14
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    Teaching friend

    One more suggestion - meet her at your local quilting store. Don't they have a table for people to work? That way she (or you) could also buy supplies if needed.

  15. #15
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    That is so heartwarming to know that she wants to become engaged in quilting and for you to be willing to teach her. As others have mentioned I would first teach her to hand quilt and if that progresses well then discuss how you can set her up with a machine. I also recommend it be at her home for a the reasons mentioned above. Especially for liability since she is familiar with her space. God bless !

  16. #16
    Senior Member Barbshobbies's Avatar
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    I am glad this subject came up. We have a sister-in-law with this problem. We have a beautiful dinning set, that we use in our kitchen, because it is the only room big enough. It is over 100 years old, and we had it refinished (not a cheap deal) and it was the only thing I got from my parents estate, and we love it. When the sister-in-law comes over I am so afraid she will hurt her self by using one of the chairs. She cannot get up from it unless she slides the chair back and then braces herself against something. WE do not have the option to visit at her place because she can not clean her place and does not want any one to come in the house. The three dogs in the house don`t help either. By the way she has many health problems, and told us there is nothing she do medically to help herself. So sad!

  17. #17
    Super Member wordpaintervs's Avatar
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    I sure love the kind heartedness I always find in this forum. It is wonderful. I agree with many here...do what you can to help this woman learn whatever form of sewing she needs, and do it at her home, or in your garage IF that is workable for you. Maybe she NEEDS to be out of her home and accepted, but do it on your terms, so no one is upset if things get broken. Good luck and I applaud you for wanting to help out. We need more folks like you in our world.
    Vickey S.

  18. #18
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    what a wonderful thing to share your knowledge. I also think that helping her sit up a place to sew at her home would be great. not only will she be where she can manuver around but have a place set up to sew even if you aren't there. When i first started I would of loved for someone to get me started setting up and not be so lost. If she is a beginning sewer to begin with keep it simple. my one friend was upset cause the class we took was what she concidered over her head. she just wanted to learn and felt comfortable with just squares.so simple is good. that way she learns and gets the feel of the machine and those 1/4 seams. learns cutting straight lines etc.

  19. #19
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    She is definitely going to need a sewing station/quilting space at her own home, so that would be my suggestion. Is she mobile enough to get out on her own or do you need to take supplies to her? What does she have and what does she need? Does she want to machine or hand piece? I really think I'd offer to go to her place or to a LQS. You can go home when you get ready!

  20. #20
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    Sit up a sewing machine in her bedroom. That was she can either sit on her bed or on a chair. Or you can cut some square and teach her how to sew by hand. either way you will make her happy.

  21. #21
    Super Member Dolphyngyrl's Avatar
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    Do you have a lightweight travel machine to take to her place or keep upstair to work on rather than having her go down stairs
    Brother XL-3500i, SQ-9050, Dreamweaver XE6200D, Juki MO-2000QVP

  22. #22
    Super Member chuckbere15's Avatar
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    I was once extremely over weight, almost 400 pounds, and I have MS on top of it. I'm my opinion, be excited about teaching a new wanna be to quilt while addressing your concerns about her safety. She'll understand and not take it the wrong way. She'll be more comfortable in her own home, I was before I lost over 130 pounds.

    You have a heart of gold!
    The Quilting Bear

  23. #23
    Senior Member Honeynga's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eva Knight View Post
    A person has asked me to teach her how to quilt. That is not the problem. I'm way to much over weight, so I'm not being mean or any thing like that. This person weights about 650-700 lbs. Yes, that much. My worrie is how do I get her downstairs to my sewing room? She has a lot of mobility problems. It's to far to walk around to the bs-ment door and downhill-uphill so she can't go the didstance. The other thing is, what to have for her to sit on? It scares me to death to think of her trying to go down the stairs. 13 steps. What do I do?
    I think having your friend go to a LQS is a great suggestion.....HOWEVER, I live in neighboring Carrollton, GA, and don't know of a LQS in the Newnan area. Before I started quilting I knew of an awesome shop on the square in Newnan but think it is closed. Here in Carrollton we have a shop that would be fairly easy for her to navigate; close parking, no steps, etc.

    I think I would offer to go to her house; take your own sewing machine and supplies.

    Would like for you to PM me and perhaps we could meet up sometimes ! I go to Newnan to shop quite often and would love to meet with a fellow quilter........keeping in mind I used the term "quilter" loosely for myself...I've a newby but love it !
    Sincerely, Sandy

  24. #24
    Member jraff's Avatar
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    About 24 years ago, I took my first quilting class at the LQS - (before rotary cutters and mats). We learned by tracing templates and handsewing along the seam lines. Therefore, no sewing machine required and no need to even have her move out of her own home.
    jraff - quilter wannabee

  25. #25
    Super Member ube quilting's Avatar
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    I had this very same problem with a private teacher. The first time she came to my house, broke two kitchen chairs and had to replace the toilet, it cracked. I phoned her before our next home class and told her I changed my mind about the tutoring. This was a private quilting teacher.

    She thought nothing of what she did to my home.

    I would suggest teaching her at her house. Pack up like you were going to a class and do it at her home.

    Peace

    I now always meet people away from my home for the first introduction.
    no act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. Aesop

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