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Thread: Men....funny!!!!

  1. #1
    Super Member Ditter43's Avatar
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    One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweatshirt..
    Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'
    'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
    He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! '
    And they say blondes are dumb.....
    ----------------------------------------------------------------
    A couple is lying in bed. The man says, 'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world....'
    The woman replies, 'I'll miss you.......
    ----------------------------
    'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
    Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
    'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
    -------------------------------------------
    Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
    A: A rumor
    -------------------------------------------
    Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
    A: Trustworthy..
    ---------------------------------------------
    Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
    A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
    ------------------------------------------
    Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
    A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..
    -------------------------------------------
    Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
    A: Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'

  2. #2
    Super Member sewwhat85's Avatar
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    you are toooo funny :lol: :lol:

  3. #3
    Power Poster CarrieAnne's Avatar
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    lol!

  4. #4
    mygirl66's Avatar
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    you crack me up!

  5. #5
    Senior Member Grinster's Avatar
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    I can always count on you to make me laugh.....every day! Thanks so much for sharing!

  6. #6
    Banned
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    As I read this my husband was whistling...I was laughing so hard I couldn't tell him why I was laughing - then all three of my DD's came and read and started laughing...I don't think we will ever be able to hear him whistle without laughing our heads off now!

  7. #7

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    LOL. My husband's reply to these... "yeah, yeah, yeah."

    Keep 'em coming.

  8. #8
    Super Member Tink's Mom's Avatar
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    LOVE the whistle joke...ROFL

  9. #9

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    Brilliant. I needed a good laugh!

  10. #10
    Super Member thequilterslink's Avatar
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    My dh didn't care for any of them, dont' know why???

  11. #11
    Senior Member dpparris's Avatar
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    LOL

  12. #12
    Junior Member Linda Loo's Avatar
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    I love you Ditter!

  13. #13
    Senior Member PWinston's Avatar
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    Ditter - - I Love You. I can't stop laughing.

  14. #14
    gaelicquilter's Avatar
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    Count on you to put a smile on my face and can't wait to read these to my DH.

  15. #15
    Super Member wolph33's Avatar
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    lol :lol:

  16. #16
    Senior Member
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    YOU ARE SO FUNNY.

  17. #17

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    Great, just what was needed on this wet and grim day in Cornwall, keep them coming!

    Gill

  18. #18
    Super Member quiltgrammyt2's Avatar
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    You CRACK me up everytime!!!!!!!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

  19. #19
    Member
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    My morning laugh, you keep me giggling all day. Love it'

    Ginnie

  20. #20
    Super Member
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    Thanks for the morning kick-start...very funny!

  21. #21
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    love all of the jokes cracks me up

  22. #22
    Junior Member sandiannie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by isewhappy
    LOL. My husband's reply to these... "yeah, yeah, yeah."

    Keep 'em coming.
    mine replied "hope she don't get beat by a bunch of whistling men" hehehe I love them ... thanks Ditter

  23. #23
    Junior Member redeagle's Avatar
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    Since we have many OHIO STATE sweatshirts in this family, this story really hit home.!! TOO FUNNY!

  24. #24
    Super Member
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    Thank You, again Ditter!!!

  25. #25
    Super Member belmer's Avatar
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    Where in the world do you come up with these?.... They are always so funny. Thanks for the Great laugh today!

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