Have you ever wanted "permission" to - -
 

Not finish a project that someone gave you?

But you felt sort of an obligation to "do something" with the "gift"?

And lots of "guilt" for wanting it to go away?

At one time I would have. Now I'm good at saying "Thank you so much for thinking of me" when I receive a gift without feeling that I have to use it. Someone thought enough to give me a gift. What I do with it doesn't matter that much to me.

I've not been in that place, as of yet. How much time and effort would need to go into it, in order to finish it? Would it be a waste of time and effort? Could you donate it? Either to a child, charity, senior citizen home, women's shelter? It might be worth it, to finish it. So you can get it out of your home...

When I was younger, I probably would have felt very guilty if someone gave me a quilt or other project to finish whether it was to finish for them or to finish and find a home for it. I'm in my 70's now and I don't feel the need to accept everything others want to give me. I 'm fine saying, "Thank you for thinking of me but I have too many other things I want to do and can't possibly add any more items to my list." I know I should be able to just say, NO, but I feel that that would be taken as rudeness by many in my family or circle of friends.

Keep in mind that most "gifted" unfinished quilts are only gifted because someone else got bored or frustrated with it. Giving it to you releases them from the burden and and makes it yours. I do not see that as a gift, I see it as an offer. With an offer, you are free to say no. I have enough trouble finishing what I start, finishing what another has begun is even worse to me. Offer it to the local gold to be finished for charity, or throw it out. You have my permission. Now doesn't' that make you feel more relaxed?

Excellent response.
sandy

Life's too short to spend working on something you don't like. If you belong to a guild, how about putting it on the "free" table? Several of our members do that, and these half-done projects get snapped right up. And you also have my permission to throw it away!!

I'm a single retired adult. I don't require "permission" for anything.

Yes. i have one right now that was given to me. i want to finish it but i have lot's of other projects going. The person eho gave it to me keeps asking when am I going to get it finished. I figure that if it was that important she should have kept it and finished it. I never asked for the project. it will get done when I am ready to do it.

"Keep in mind that most "gifted" unfinished quilts are only gifted because someone else got bored or frustrated with it. Giving it to you releases them from the burden and and makes it yours. I do not see that as a gift, I see it as an offer. With an offer, you are free to say no. I have enough trouble finishing what I start, finishing what another has begun is even worse to me. Offer it to the local gold to be finished for charity, or throw it out. You have my permission. Now doesn't' that make you feel more relaxed?"

What Madame Kelly said .... Perfect!