The sweltering curse
(In blistering verse) By: Mary Schmich Too hot, too hot Too hot to think Too hot, so hot I need a drink. A drink with ice To dry my sweat Just standing still I'm sopping wet. Too hot, too hot Too hot to work (A great excuse To nap and shirk.) I'll tell the boss I'm off today (Although it is Too hot to play.) Too hot to nap Too hot to eat Too hot to dress Too hot to tweet. It's hot too early Hot too late So many hot hot Things to hate: That sticky feel Behind the knees That icky dirty Ozone breeze. The stinky sweat Upon your feet The clammy ring Left on your seat. Your frizzy hair Your soggy bed The coming outage From ComEd. It's hotter here Than Phoenix dirt It's hotter than Ms. Monroe's skirt. It's Southern hot Oh no, it's worse At least the South Expects this curse. It's Houston hot! Miami heat! It's hotter than On Bourbon Street! So hot Chicago's Like a bog It's muggy, buggy Dense with fog. Too hot too hot To tell a joke How hot is that? Like I said, it is just too hot to think of a good "it's so hot" joke. So hot that Blago's hair might wilt But not so hot He'll melt with guilt. So very very Very hot So hot you smell The mold and rot. So hot it chafes Your inner legs So hot that chickens Lay fried eggs. So hot the air Could bake a peach Too hot to lie Out at the beach. Too hot to play A game of ball So hot you fondly Dream of fall. So hot you even Miss the snow Oh, where'd the bliss Of blizzards go? Too hot to walk Too hot to bike Too hot to jog Too hot to hike But as we swelter Whine and moan Let's not forget: This heat's on loan. As fast as we Can say July The summer will Have said goodbye. Copyright © 2011, Chicago Tribune |
thanks, it sure is hot
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Sounds like a Dr. Seuss book!!! And, yes.....whew! It's HOT!
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It is hot here too. I can't wait for Sept., sure hope it is cooler than. I hate the heat.
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LOL!
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Yes, It is HOT!! I hate to complain cause not too long ago we were complaining about the cold, but that won't stop me. It is just Too Hot to Handle!!
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I don't want winter, or even fall. Just a *normal* summer. We are running about 10 degrees hotter here. (And that's in the shade!)
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I'm in the minority, I love the heat. Summer is my favorite time of the year. Having lived in the South 95% of my life I am used to the heat and the humidity. The only time I complain is when it is cold.
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Wonderful Sue Fish!!!
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Just a reminder to check on neighbors, the elderly and our furry friends. Weather right now...99 at Ohare. That is hot.
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