How do you tell your relatives that you have no desire or interest in altering their clothes without creating family problems? Some think because I have a sewing machine I am always available for making alterations and I hate alterations. I also do not like being imposed upon. Tell me how to say no.

Rita

Hehehehe maybe do not tell them and "fix" some thing. That might cure them.

I always tell people that I do not alter clothes for 2 reasons:
1. I do not have the skill set
2. I do not have the equipment to do it right

I just laugh it off like it is funny and walk away. They never ask twice.

I had DH's suit pants taken in 8" one time by a tailor...only cost $12.00 --- believe me...it was worth it! Just say "I don't do fixing - I'm not good at it"....and give them an estimate of what the tailor would charge. They'll get over it.

Age old problem, I just say I'll do it but can't guarantee when I can get it back to them, if they need it soon they better get it done at the dry cleaner. Gradually, everyone stopped asking, except my daughter, who helps me in return with other things.

My newest problem is I made new window drapery treatments for my LR, DR, and family room. Now everyone wants to know if I'll do it for them. I decided to tell them I was starting a business and my hourly rate was $30.' and it took an average of 20 hours per treatment. No one has returned with a followup. Ha, Ha.

I feel your pain. The same thing has happend to me and I just had to finally tell him that I couldn't help him. I told him that I don't have the time or skill to do that kind of work and make it look good. Which is the truth. So I gave him the number of a lady who does alterations at a fair price.

Tell them NO!!
And then send them to the nearest dry cleaner store.

I always say I'm a quilter not seamstress. When my clothing does not fit I go buy new ones I don't fix them!! They never ask again. Here is a funny: a friend once asked me to fix a pair of jeans for her DD so I gave her a spool of thread and a needle. I don't know if she did it or not but she never asked again.

I've been roped into way too many alterations. I know someone who says every. single. time. he sees me that I should put out a shingle to do them. He just doesn't get my response that it sucks all the fun out of my hobby! Ugh!

1. you just don't have the time
2. your not comfortable doing it.
3. tell them you don't even to your own.

then,get the phone number ready of a tailor in your area, and give it to them..a business card from whoiever does do it,would be good.

i do not hem or make altertions..

i replace buttons on my brothers white work shirts cuz the dry cleaner crushes them all eventually. that is the only thing i do that is non quilting. and only for him!

Thanks for your replys. Gotta practice the little word--no.
Rita

I started out as a seamstress so I've always had the same problem, I absolutely HATE doing alterations so it's easy for me to just say no. I used to be afraid of hurting peoples feelings but as I get older I don't really care much any more.

My dear MIL, God rest her soul, told people that while her 8 children were growing up, she made most of their clothes. When they were grown, she stopped sewing for necessity and began to sew for pleasure. Everybody understood.

My old trainer always came to me when she needed to have a western costume altered for one of her clients. I quite enjoyed the challenge, but did say no on occasion when the alteration essentially involved a complete re-sew :-)

I am not a seamstress! Piecing a quilt is just straight lines...at least for me. I even take my own clothes to be altered.

My mom had a "friend" who would bring a garbage bag full of clothing needing mending and alterations, at no cost to her, of course! And of course, my mom never thought she could just say "No." (Thank goodness for one area where I don't take after her!) Anyway, the last time, this "friend" brought her favorite satin gym shorts. The satin seams had frayed terribly. By the time my mom trimmed the frayed fabric, the shorts were significantly smaller. I don't think the "friend" asked my mom to mend again, after that!

I used to make all of my daughters clothes. Loved doing it. But didn't like to alter. After getting stuck doing it for years because I didn't want to turn anyone down when they asked, I learned to say No. What a relief! I simply said I don't do that anymore.

Look them straight in the eye and ask if they would trust Picasso to paint their house. If that fails, then tell them the truth--you don't know how/don't want to.

My husband, after sewing patches on his uniforms and altering his pants (because they come to us unhemmed), began offering my services to his buddies. I wanted to be nice, so I started doing this. Instead of them giving me something as a thank you, they usually brought my husband a six pack of beer, or a bottle of Jack Daniels. Finally, I told my husband that he was welcome to learn how to do it himself, but enough was enough. If he did it, they could give him beer, but if I still had to do it, they had to give me a gift certificate to Jo-Anns instead of beer. After that, my husband didn't offer my services any more.

mine finally quit asking :thumbup:
i have one cousin who still thinks i should do mending for him...i have a pair of his pants on a closet shelf...been there for 3 years now,..they need a new zipper,..when i see him he usually has a new stack of mending...and tells me about it. i simply say, "Ya, i bet you do have more....i still have that pair of pants you want a new zipper in...if i ever get those done maybe i'll take some more"--he usually laughs and says...oh, ok...well if you ever have time...i would pay you...
everyone else gave up long ago on getting anything mended, with one (and only one) exception...my 97 year old gentlman i take care of...i hem, sew on buttons, anything he needs...he's (different/special) oh, i did finally (only took 1 1/2 years) mend a pair of hubby's pants.
i just tell anyone who asks...it may take me a year or so to get to it...that is usually deterrent enough :-D

I tell people I quilt and don't sew clothes. Heck, I wouldn't even know where to begin on clothing!

GOOD IDEA!!

just say you don't know how to do that. that's what cleaners are for who have people that do alterations.

I don't do alterations. I tried it a few times years ago with disastrous results. Sometimes you just have to say "no".

I've even been asked to repair a tent! Jean zippers too...I don't know how to put in a zipper...so yeah I just say I can make quilts and that's all.

I do not sew. I quilt!

I don't do alterations either.

I teach sewing in a high school and my poor students are always bringing in stuff from family and relatives for repair or alteration. We have a lesson on "just say no". I hate fixin' stuff, I have a wonderful gal at a local cleaners that does all my fixes for me.

I need that lesson !
Rita

Do the Nancy Reagen!!! :D:D

That is really funny.

I did use to do repairs for my lawyer, he paid me the same hourly rate he made, so I did not mind. My kids learned to do their own, cause I would let it sit till they out grew the clothes.

Even if you've already said yes, you can still say no. It's easy.

"Sorry. I don't have time."
"Sorry. I don't have the skills."
And, my favorite:
"Sorry. I don't want to do it."

I used to sew for myself, but I have never liked alterations. Just be up fron and tell them it takes a special skill to do it properly.

I think I will do what the other Carrie did from now on, and just give them a spoolo thread and a needle, lol!

Brilliant idea. Why not follow that model? :twisted:

My daughter is the worst. I use to make all her clothes and the rest of the family too. It was much easier when they were little no alterations. Now ..... I just leave it sit until it doesn't fit anymore. lol Now that I have moved in with my brother he has started doing the same thing. I really need to learn to say no.But since I am the "poor" relation and he is giving me a roof over my head....

This thught fpr the day just caught my attention. I think this may be at the root of my problem. I want to please everyone.

February 22, 2011 - Tuesday



"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone."



~ Bill Cosby

I like to sew, I don't like to mend or alter. My answer to people is that I was taught to mend and hem by hand when I was a kid and I would be glad to show them how.

Smile sweetly and say,..."well that depends,...do you actually plan to wear it again?"

I am going with the age remark...I am older now...if I hurt someones feeling saying NO..let it be....I had NO said to me enough in my life time....lol.....I have pants in closet eeds hemmed...cant do mine why should u worry about theres....lol