I have decided that teenagers become unpleasant so it is easier to let them go.

So instead of thinking "my baby is growing up" the thinking is "I can't wait for you to be on your own"

And if you have menopause and puberty attempting to co-exist in the same household at the same time - it can be "interesting"

I told all the nieces and nephews that when they hit 13....I don't want to hear from them until they hit 21 :roll: ...they think I'm kidding....I'm not :wink:

OH boy do you ladies have it right.
Thank goodness I've only got this last one to live through and then I'll be ok.

HAHA My GF told me the same thing when her two were in HS. They were 4 and 8 years older then my only child. When she was in HS she was a dream and I sought therapy to prepare for her to leave home. Then she graduated on 06-06-06 (there is a hint in there) and she began to pay me back for all those years of being the perfect child. Things are getting better now. She will be 21 in one month.

Give them to me! I am a high school teacher, and I love teenagers. They are open to new ideas, not usually jaded by bad experiences, fun-loving, generally positive, hard-working, interested, and curious. Of course, there are the more challenging ones. In talking to parents, we are usually surprised to discover that they are very different at school than at home. Sometimes great students, horrible kids, and vice-versa. Overall, I find they give me lots of energy and positivity. And the tough ones make me come home and sew my frustrations out, so they are good motivators!
Now, what I'm worried about is when my kids are teens. I don't know if it will be great to be with them all day and come home to more. :shock:

The reason that teenagers are the way they are is so that we shove them out of the nest at the first possible opportunity, instead of whining about how much we miss them.

College is expensive....but man, is it nice!!!

Never had any problems with my daughters as teens, but ask about my son and I could write 100 books. He is 36 now, owns his own business and is doing great. But from 13 to 25 - WOW! His Dad died when he was almost 14 and that is when things turned bad!!

I think I was very lucky with my daughter and two sons. None of them were trouble makers or got into tooooo much trouble. The most irritating thing was that the older they got, the lower my I.Q. became in their eyes. I'm happy to report that now that they are 31, 28, and 24, I am "smart" again. :roll:

My grandma always told me when I was a kid that when you turn 13 it will be legal for us to beat you up when you get bratty!! I always thought it was true, until I turned 13, of course then I realized that she had been pulling my leg. My grandma has always been one to take in "stays", kids who's parents couldn't keep them in line for some reason or another. There is just something about her that really gets teenagers!! And now the couple of kids she took in at different times, are adults with families and careers. She must have beat the good sense into them when they turned 13 :wink: I do not look forward to my boyfriend's daughters becoming teenagers, but at least I know where to send them!!!!

I had a lot of fun with my teens, it was nothing short of a miracle to see them stepping into the role of young adults. Then something happened, my oldest son met a girl and his brains went on holiday and never came back, my daughter decided she knew more than I did, so I told her she had better move out before she forgot it!

I am waiting for the day when I have to account for unleashing them on society! LOL

For the most part they were great kids, as young adults they are doing well for themselves and that is all a parent can ask for...I can't say that I agree with some of the choices they have made, but I don't have to live with the consequences, so all I can do is respect their right to make mistakes. :)

We had a great time with our kids as teenagers. They were great kids,stayed out of trouble, talked to us, actually liked to hang around with us. The only real problem we had was our son who gave up on school, almost didn't graduate, but he was still the sweetest guy, actually even talked to us about his day and what was going on at school. I really miss my kids and all the great times we had. My son, who is the youngest, turned 20 in December. I had 14 years of teenagers. I wish I could have at least one of them back in the house!!!!
I am glad that DD#3 will be home for the summer after she graduates from college. She will return to school in the fall to finish up her Master's and teaching Credential and then she hopes to return to our area. I sure hope so.
I do however know many many people who did not have a great experience with their Teenagers. I guess we were very lucky!!!!!

I enjoyed my teenagers. They may have turned my hair gray, but it was always interesting. As they became adults we became more like friends. I love it. Now that my DGD lives with me they cycle starts again. Can't wait. Of course I have always loved roller coaster rides. That's what having a teen is like. Tee Hee :D :D :D :D

My oldest son and I were so close -- until he turned 16 or 17. :evil: I think at one point I might've drowned him if I'd ever had a chance... :lol:

But I agree with you, bearisgrey -- I think it's nature's way of getting us to let them go. No sooner did he go off to college than he became his old wonderful self again, but by then he was gone... :cry: Same thing happened with his younger brother.

They're both in their 30s now and I count myself so lucky to know them. I think of them as friends as well as sons.... Smart, hard-working, clever, funny, caring people. My younger son is the most patient and loving father/husband you could wish for.

They're definitely the best things I've done in my life! :P

My youngest is 18 and my oldest is 22. I have loved every second of their teenage years. I wouldn't trade a second of it for any amount of money.
Judy

I was a horrible teenager and it prompted me not to have children. A former boss of mine lamented the fact that it was not possible with all the scientific advances to freeze-dry teenagers and thaw them out when they turn back to human.

My eldest son will be the last one of my 4 to graduate from college, in a few weeks. It just took him a while to find his way. But, he already has a job lined up, so I almost have them all off the runway!

It is so interesting now when we have family get-togethers. My children really enjoy each other's company now, but when they were teens they fought like cats and dogs.

[quote=Quiltin'Lady]My oldest son and I were so close -- until he turned 16 or 17. :evil: I think at one point I might've drowned him if I'd ever had a chance... :lol:



Ah-ha! I have considered starvation, suffocation by dirty laundry piles, infection by dirty urine covered toilet seat, accidental loss of limb because I couldn't find the darn thing, vehicular accident due to lack of gas when you borrowed the car, but drowning....Yes, drowning it is .....in the tub I told you to please clean 3 months ago that is now harboring pink nasties!!

Please send me your address and I will gladly mail up to 2 teens. No need to reimburse me for shipping. The pleasure is all mine :wink: ..

I worried about my daughters- thinking they would be horrible. The teen years flew by, it wasn't until younger daughter was away at college that I realized I had survived the teen years! I have a great relationship with them- we talk daily about anything. Love them to pieces.

Now my sons- wow- what happened? The youngest was put on the earth to test my patience and at 19, still does. Don't get me wrong, he's a good kid, but no motivation. I keep waiting for something to peak his interest. Someday.... Other son is on the eight year plan for college. Right now on year 5. I'm a firm believer that kids need time to discover themselves, but I would love to put a dollar value on the wasted classes. He has settled down, dean's List now and working full time too. He's a great guy and has goals.

Over all- I'm pleased with them. They are all real nice kids to be around. I love talking to them and being a part of their lives without being overbearing.

You do know the reason why teens seem to sleep so much? They need that rest after spewing all those "emotions" at everyone they come across and thinking their smarter than their parents eventually gives them extreme fatigue.

I was way lucky to have two girls and the teenage years were smooth. I am still close to both of them and now my youngest has move to land in front of me and it is a blessing to look at my front door and have a view of her and her daughter living thier day to day life. I am just truly blessed to have her in my life she was almost taken from me at 21 (cancer). Now the Grand kids of this new generation I would probably strip thier skin off if I had to live with them and raise them. BOY :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

Its when you are living it ,that its hard...I try to get through one day at a time with my 16 year old grandson.

My three had their ups and downs, but my opinion is I love them all between the ages of 2 through 8, then I recommend boarding school

I'm not teen friendly :?

Obviously, it depends on how they are raised, and especially what kinds of influences are in their life. My sons were TERRIBLE preschoolers, but the adolescent and young adult (I prefer that term to "teenager") years were delightful. They were a lot of fun and life was so much easier every year. Now the youngest is 20!

Funny!!!!!!

My oldest daughter was a nightmare. Drugs, alcohol, etc. We hung in with her, tough love sometimes - didn't allow her to live with us, etc, -and she turned herself around, started college slowly and is now working on her Masters in Anchorage in archeology. I am so absolutely proud of her. It took her until 30 to do it, but she did it! Never give up.

My teens are fun and well adjusted. They still give me gray hair though! Boys, girls, driving, influences, hormones, etc. Not for the squeamish. Hang in there everyone. Send me good vibes and I'll send you some! We can do it!

I just posted a sign in the living room that said "I know why some animals eat their young!" Grossed the kids out!! lol I also posted on the 'fridge this saying: Teenagers!!Tired of your parents complaining all the time and of the restrictions??? Move out now, while you know everything!!! :lol: :lol:

Didn't work. They all stayed home until they either went into the military or college, but now...they are humans again and oh so loveable!! Mine are 29, 24 and soon to be 21 (male, male and female in that order.) Now that 24yo caused a lot of gray/silver hair and is still looking for himself, but at least he's looking. I keep him in prayer constantly!! But he has a heart of gold and would do anything for anyone.

It helps to know that we aren't the only ones going through this!! lol We need more support groups for parents of teenagers/young adults!! Share our stories and solutions. lol

Hear! Hear! I'll take the rest. Not only do I work in a high school with teenagers, I work with the most difficult of them all. I think I'm becoming the school grandma and the teens treat me accordingly.
They teach me as much as I teach them - and I let them know it.

Teenagers keep me young.

I regret sometimes that I couldn't have my own kids back as teenagers, those were such exciting years. No, not all fun and games, but definitely stimulating.

Something too many people forget is that teenagers are still children in many ways and NEED their parents for direction, rules and just plain loving 'em up.

I miss the years when my kids were teenagers. Really, I do! There were a lot of kids around our house, and I felt like I would never grow old. There were a lot of fun times - and a lot of meals to cook! Fortunately, they learned to cook and do laundry by the time they were teenagers.

When I came home from work in the summertime, someone was usually cooking dinner, and someone else would hand me a drink (this was after the kids were old enough to do that sort of thing!) That's when good parenting really paid off! I got to sit down and take a load off and enjoy the evening.

My son and daughter share the fun parts of their lives with me and my husband, and they talk to me when they have problems to solve, and it makes me proud that they do. Life isn't all roses and lollipops, but there's a lot more fun than tears.

Me and my brother were that way. We fought from about the age of 12 until he left home at 17. Yet when I needed a place to stay a few years ago he was the first one to open his home to me. We get along great now.

I don't know what i've done wrong

Barb, what do you mean?

I loved my childrens teen-age years! They went so fast and you can't take it back. I wish we were able to have even more life experiances together. embrace their ideas, listen to them, they are more open minded then we give them credit. love them to pieces!! be carefull what you wish for.

I don't know, i guess kids go through stages, even our adult kids. When my two girls were teenagers, they were inseparable. And our house was a fun time then. Then right after their teen years, oldest one became snobby to youngest ones life choices, and visa versa, and you just wouldnt even know they are sisters. When my oldest one was in her twenties, she loved for the two of us to go shopping, then she had her baby and lived with us for awhile, and when she got her own place she was only 20 mins away, as a single mom she was alone and bored, so she would phone us every night, and we'd see her and elisa several days a week. Now she has a fiance, and they're an hour and a half away. We're lucky if she phones us once a month, we phone couple days a week just to try and talk to our grandaughter, and most of the time she just wont answer the phone. So i know she has a life now, but somehow she makes it clear that we're not good enough for her. I know she is disgusted with me having hd, because now i can't be her "all in all". So it's complicated. But, i think she just has some growing up to do, but we used to have fun, a lot of fun, now she doesnt want to so whatever.

Oh, Barb, I think she may be frightened, not disgusted, that you have HD? Maybe she hasn't come to terms with it yet. And she is afraid she's losing you, and distancing herself is the only way she can cope right now. I don't know how old your 2 girls are, but my 2 went through some stages when they wouldn't even talk to each other. Now they are best friends. Keep trying to contact her, dear.

I second that motion about them being frightened and no knowing what to say or do and distancing them for awhile. Sad but very likely - their coping mechanis,/
I know very little about HD. If you feel like it, pm me about it. Is there anything I can do to help? Are there support groups? Breast cancer support groups have been a great help to me, and I'll volunteer to help at the center in CT when I get there.

















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Joanne

Barb, some of her issues may be the fear of getting it herself as well. I don't know anything about Huntington's Disease, but so many different diseases are hereditary and I think it scares children and grand children to think that this may happen to them too. Just my thought.

BIG HUGS BIG HUGS BIG HUGS!!!!

I second what everyone else is saying. She is scared and distancing herself. She will come around. :)

yes, i've thought that could be it, was just having a down moment is all. Thanks for hugs. I mean, i know that we are luckier than most, to have had our grandaughter with us as a baby, we are just spoilt and used to being able to see her so much too. Thanks :)

Thanks joanne, but no, i have my hd forum too, i've just been having a moody day, so this was a good thread to vent on :) But i'll be fine