LOL I like the last one. Reminds me of "It pays to be paranoid", and " Humpty Dumpty was pushed!"

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't teach a dog old tricks.

kwitchyrbelakin,a hard head totes a sore a**.

I’ve only read to page 5 so these could be duplicates. Have got to read the rest! :)

From my Dad: You’re bored? Go clean your room! Or he'd find another chore for me to do.

From my Grandmother: If you’re ears are ringing say the names of out loud or to yourself of the people you know. When it stops the last name you said is someone who was talking or thinking about you.

From my Grandfather: If you can’t say something nice don’t say anything. He always added that there is something nice that you can find to say.

My dad's was Happy hands are busy hands and busy hands are happy hands, so busy, busy, busy.

Also my fifth grade teacher often said, If you do not use your head you will use your feet. Thank you Mrs. Wills!

Three that come to mind when I was growing up,

Go tell it to Sweeney!!

It hurts to be beautiful.

Cute as a bug's ear!

Ut............ just thought of a few more:


The hotter the fire the stronger the steel.

Out of the frying pan and into the fire.

Here a few of my grandma's favorites- "Can't" lives in a mud-hole. If first you don't succeed, try try again. He/she would complain if hung with a gold rope! Haste makes waste. If you can't say something nice - say nothing at all. Thanks for sharing I have enjoyed them all and recognized many.

Don't judge them till you've walked in their shoes!
Buck up!
Don't bite off more than you can chew!
You'll turn into a pumpkin at midnight!
Stupid is as stupid does!
You're such a PITA!(pain in the ass)
What goes around, comes around!
You'll get your turn!

If wishes were real a frog wouldn't bump his butt when he hops.

They would climb a tree to tell a lie before they would tell the truth on the gound.

I would always tell my children when they came in dirty from outside - well you are washable you know.

Another line I would catch myself saying due to the fact that all of our childrens names started with A's, well you know which one you are when I would say one name and actually meant one of the other ones.

I just remembered this one from my Grandma: Can't never did try.

My mother didn't have the excuse of our names starting with the same letter, but she often called us by our siblings names and would go thru the list till she got to the right name. Then she would laugh and say: Just calling the roll.

If wishes were fishes we would all have a pond full

I can't tell you how many times I heard that crying one! I thought was just a my dad thing but I guess not! Unless you are a sister I didn't know I had!

Knee high to a puddle duck.

Funnier than the split hairs on a frog's back.

YOu see the look on my face and you're still talking to me?

That's the last straw on the camel's back

If she jumped in the lake would you follow her? (of course)

Uglier than a dog walking backwards
Dumber than a box of rocks
Let's say we do & don't (meaning we can say we did it & we didn't)
They don't have 2 nickles to rub together

My granddaughters babysitter always said--"You get what you get and you don't throw a fit"! I love it.

It's not what you say but how you say it.

Knee high to a grasshopper

'finer than frog's hair'

Fancier than socks on a rooster!

Cool beans!

He worked me like a borrowed mule!

Time to get up, before all the good air is used up.

What are you doing?...mildewing

My grandmother who also lived in Maine, when she was startled would say: "My stars and garters!" and this was considered slightly scandalous!
JP

My grandmother who also lived in Maine, when she was startled would say: "My stars and garters!" and this was considered slightly scandalous!
JP

i have something similar above my desk... never argue with a truck driver, you'll just get agrivated & the driver loves it.

I absolutely know what a slop bucket is!!! I carried many of them in my childhood whenever my brother and I spent the summer at Grandma's house!! :D Grandma also had a pee pot (hope it's okay that I said that :? ). I'm sure you can guess what that was!!!! :shock: It was only used late at night if you didn't want to go out in the dark to the outhouse. I had to empty that out several times, too in my childhood!!! YUCK!!!! :thumbdown:

Hmmm.....one saying that comes to mind is, "Like water off a duck's back."

My mom made a verse of the Patience:
Patience is a virtue; possess it if you can.
Seldom found in women -- never in a man!

How many heard my grandma's frequent comment, "Oh piffle!"?

I just remembered another one - Oh fiddlesticks

" if you are looking for sympathy , Look in the dictionary between sh-t and suicide."

***happens

My MIL was quite a character, bless her. Here are some of her favorites:
"Hold er Newt, she's a rare'n"
For every pregnant woman she saw she would say, "it looks like someone poked some fun at her and she took him seriously"
"She looks as though she has been rode hard and put up wet."

"Piffle diffle" was one of my favorites-I still use it.

Have heard so many of these... Takes me back years and years.

Mom (when her sciatica was bothering her):
"Ooh! I got a hitch in my get-a-long"

When her constitution was amuck
"Get out of the way, I have the hurry-ups"
Dad after spicy food, would say: "I've got the come on ice-creams"

DH's mom would threaten: "Knock it off or I'm gonna pinch off your head and spit in the hole" - I was afraid of her for the longest time.

Well, ya can't take it with ya
Cleanliness is next to Godliness
Better than getting poked in the eye with a sharp stick
If he was any closer, it would have bit him
He's three cans short of a six pack
Buy ya books, send ya to school and all ya do is eat the books
Time's a waistin
Well, can't dance and it's too late to plow
Hair of the dog (morning after a hangover drink)
Just for sh*ts and giggles
What's that sh*t eatin grin about?
She's a little P*ss ant.
She's dumber than a doorknob (or doughnut)
Want a little cracker with that wine
I may be used - but I aint used up

Gotta tell ya a little story:
Mom had six kids in the 50's. Three boys then three girls in that order. She used to put us all in the station wagon to pick up dad from work (every day). One of us would smart off and she would give you the evil eye in the rear view mirror. I don't know if other moms could do this, but she could look in the mirror, reach down, take off her flip flop, fling it over her shoulder (with just a simple flick) and hit which ever of us was the offender right square in the mouth. The woman had eyes in the back of her head. (I remember when I was small - looking for them under her ponytail).

DH Used to say "Urban cowboys put their names on their belts, so that when they get their head out of their *ss they would remember who they were."

Thanks for the memories.

MY Darling Grandmother ,, once i said a cuss word in front of her { oh s**t } she said I wouldn't hold in my hand, what you just had in your mouth. I to miss them all.

That is so funny.

Yes, she said that too! And that was as close as she came to cursing.

A new one we use now comes from my grandson. When he was two and I was in the kitchen and called into the living room to ask what he was doing he said "I'm lie downing".

Very good advice and I agree 100%.

My Mom used to tell my 5 brothers when they were frowning over being told they couldn't have or do something they wanted, "If you keep making that face it is going to freeze that way." I don't know if they believed her, but it usually worked. I don't recall her ever saying that to me, but of course I WAS a perfect child. LOL

I remember almost ALL of these. This is a long one that I remember my mom saying to me (wonder why).

"There is a little bit of good in the worst of us and a little bit of bad in the best of us so it behooves none of us to talk about the rest of us."

"Getting old isn't for sissy's"
"The dimmest lamp in the room."
"He's a penny short of a dime."
"Life is good. Don't mess with it!"
"If I die today - I die a happy man."
"See a penny, pick it up you'll have good luck. See a penny let it lay and you'll have a bad day!"
"Go West young man." (Get out of my face.)
"A man gave a dollar of all he had and a woman gave a dime and it was all she had."

This was fun :o).