Originally Posted by PatriceJ

i, too, am dreading the responses. :lol:

first, let me assure you that your sentiments are shared by far more members than you might think.

now ... on the other hand ... and please do not interpret this as an argument against your point because it is not.

it is possible that we paint with too wide a brush when we throw around words like "most." it does often prove to be true that the majority of people who add comments to the topics you've described tend to add their own negative thoughts and suggestions; what they think are corroborating horror stories, etc. anger feeds anger and things spiral out of control very quickly.

but ... here's the question:

does that necessarily mean that most of our members altogether think that way, and react that way?

i think not. i think the reason such topics remain under the control of the Negative Nellies and Hysterical Hannahs is that the Sensible Sues and the Positive Pams move right on past them without stopping to comment. they avoid getting sucked into all the drama. so it looks like anger, fear, offense, etc are the dominant perspective when they really are not.

so, while i personally agree with what you've said, i must respectfully disagree with the conclusion to which your observations have led you.

the squeaky wheel gets the oil.

the quiet, well balanced, properly inflated wheel keeps us rollin' along on a smooth and mostly happy road.

Originally Posted by Rachel

I take it more as someone just needed to get something off their chest, so they aren't holding it in. I just read and let it go. sometimes you just need someone to listen.

Originally Posted by BellaBoo

Misery loves company and it does help to hear of misery when you have a misery of your own. The mood passes but it helps to waller every now and then.

Originally Posted by PatriceJ

i, too, am dreading the responses. :lol:

first, let me assure you that your sentiments are shared by far more members than you might think.

now ... on the other hand ... and please do not interpret this as an argument against your point because it is not.

it is possible that we paint with too wide a brush when we throw around words like "most." it does often prove to be true that the majority of people who add comments to the topics you've described tend to add their own negative thoughts and suggestions; what they think are corroborating horror stories, etc. anger feeds anger and things spiral out of control very quickly.

but ... here's the question:

does that necessarily mean that most of our members altogether think that way, and react that way?

i think not. i think the reason such topics remain under the control of the Negative Nellies and Hysterical Hannahs is that the Sensible Sues and the Positive Pams move right on past them without stopping to comment. they avoid getting sucked into all the drama. so it looks like anger, fear, offense, etc are the dominant perspective when they really are not.

so, while i personally agree with what you've said, i must respectfully disagree with the conclusion to which your observations have led you.

the squeaky wheel gets the oil.

the quiet, well balanced, properly inflated wheel keeps us rollin' along on a smooth and mostly happy road.

Originally Posted by SherryLea

I think instead of negativity it is just having someone to get things off your chest and speak how you think with out having to cause problems in family and friends that will last for ever. We are always saying we are here for each other does that mean we are for each other as long as it is what we want to hear. Woman need something or someone to use as a sounding board someone to bounce things off of to see if the way they feel is unusual or normal. And because this is a hobby that is mostly consisting of women it is a good place to vent and feel better. If you see a post that is negative and you do not wish to pertispate then don't read it go to one that you do want to read and comment on.
Some people have no one else to vent to as they are handicapped and shut in or not in a community that they can find friends easily. You know just maybe with a kind word or suggestion you may turn someones terrible day or exxperience around. JMOP