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-   -   Would you make a quilt for someone if you knew there ... (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/would-you-make-quilt-someone-if-you-knew-there-t102249.html)

Annaquilts 02-23-2011 07:14 AM

Yes, I definitely would but I have a tremendous burden for children in need. If you don't want to bother buy her a fleece blanket from Walmart and send it with a pretty card and kind note. One of my DD's is a big tall girl and she loves all the beautiful big quilts I made her but she also loves a tiny blue fleece blanket some random person gave her. Fleece has agreat tactile appeal and is very soft.

It seems though your heart is telling you that you want to give her the gift of a quilt and maybe that is how you are expressing your love and care for her too.

sally's girl 02-23-2011 07:17 AM

I am sure she will feel someone really cares...sound like she needs that reassurance..so yes if I were you, I would

ginnie6 02-23-2011 07:21 AM

just to clarify.....this is NOT a child I am talking about. She is 22 years old and extremely smart.....mentally though I think she is not quite that mature.....like I said there are issues. She's 9 months older than my oldest dd. When we saw her a few years ago she was just very unsure of herself and kind of awkward. That might have been from being around a huge family she doesn't really know but I think not. Things that I don't even think about my kids doing (like getting in the ocean) she was afraid of. My heart really does break for her.....but at the same time I'm very afraid to get sucked into her life.....there have been overdoses and hospitalizations, and a slew of other issues. But if I can help her I would.......I think she is a very needy young lady at this point.

rootyr 02-23-2011 07:51 AM

I would. You never know what it will mean to her.

Rebecca VLQ 02-23-2011 08:17 AM

OK, without knowing "the whole story"...

It sounds like this girl has drug problems. And...(in my experience) drug users are an opportunistic lot. They do not hold attachments to people or things, and they are looking to gain the upper hand anyway they know how...that is how they survive. That is their way of life.

No, she probably will NOT appreciate a quilt in the way a "normal" person would. She would not appreciate the gazillion hours it takes to make a lap quilt, even a standard size one. She may not tell you thank you, or express "thank you" in enough ways to "prove" to you she likes it.

HOWEVER...imagine things from her perspective. Not from her drug perspective, but from a place where she has deficits and understands the world in a diminished capacity. She is clamoring to survive. She is desperate to try and make it day to day. A quilt...can't be sold off to "make ends meet". She doesn't have a master suite to display this quilt proudly for all the Ladies Who Lunch to ooh and ah over. It may stay with her for a few months, or a few years. Whatever comfort it can give her during the time she has it is more than she had before.

It costs you only time (and some fabric) to send her some comfort. The quilt is a gift to YOU while you're working on it, to meditate-pray-think about this girl and send her well wishes. Decide how much time you want to spend and do it. Sew with a purpose, and then let all that love and concern go with the quilt, to her. Some of it is bound to rub off, kwim?

Jim's Gem 02-23-2011 08:51 AM

I think it would be a wonderful way to show her that you are thinking about her and that you love her!

Theresa 02-23-2011 08:54 AM


Originally Posted by pstoner
A gift from your heart is still a gift, once we give the gift we no longer get to decide what is done with the gift. Give her one if it will satisfy your needs, and be happy that you have done so. Love her as you can, if she doesn't come round with the same care for the gift, at least you know you have done a great thing on your part. The best thing about a gift, is the giving.

(((HUGS))))

I sooo agree. Find a pattern that doesn't take a big time commitment like a Disappearing 9 Patch.

CloverPatch 02-23-2011 08:55 AM

Nope, wouldn't do it. For some people it is just a thing, they appreciate the thought but not the object.

quilt1950 02-23-2011 08:58 AM


Originally Posted by suezquilts
I wonder if you made her apart of the quilt making, make it something special to her.
It sounds like she needs time and good memories.
I have done this with our family and they change their attitudes towards gifts.
Sue

This was my thought. Can you include her in the quilting making. I've also seen some very easy to make quilts lately, that would not take so long to make. Unfortunately, I don't know their names except that they are 'tube' quilts. One didn't have ANY seams to match.

Happy Treadler 02-23-2011 08:59 AM


Originally Posted by diane647
It really doesn't mater if I would make one or not. The real question is DO YOU WANT TO DO IT? Sometimes we already know the answer to our question. If it would make her feel loved and included it would be wonderful. However you must remember a gift is a gift, the receipent can do with it what they will.

I agree!! I, myself, stopped making home made gifts for hubby's family because they seemed to prefer the store-bought-type. I figure I'd rather just get them what they wanted. Just because it may be special to me, if the recepient didn't think so why should I take my precious time to do it?


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